Kindness and death not necessarily in that order

The reason I talk about kindness is not because of losing Ben per say but because of the events that followed losing Ben. We lived by the sea and when the sun set it would fall into the ocean with grace, a view we could even see from the front bedroom but that we always appreciated sat on the sand in whatever weather. The days following Bens death were lonely, I was too ill equipped to understand the death of anyone, let alone to the person I shared my existence with. I was torn between barely leaving the house and my own tears. The sun was beginning to set and I managed to wander out onto the beach. Barely functioning, I was crouched down, the sand too damp to sit on and watched a horse being trained to complete various impressive back ward trotting and other such things. I could see in the distance a man who had a small dog was walking down the beach. I was not aware of him until he stood near me asking if the horse was mine. I said very little other than it wasn't. There we where in the same space on the vastness of the beach as he talked with me about him travelling to America, how horses were used to heal those with disabilities as they were sensitive creatures who could help wth healing. He talked with kindness and consideration. He did not know that just that week I had lost Ben but I am sure he sensed that he should spare some time to tell a story of hope and love to the girl who sat forlorn on the beach. In my day to day life, 5 years on, I do not need people to help me, Im generally self sufficient most of the time. However my last month as my time in Qatar came to a close, I have encountered huge kindness. My dear friend Zoe and her husband Steve. They do and have continued to do selfless acts of kindness. For my last month, they spoilt me like no one else. They made me dinners, made me welcome in their home, even got me my own bed and cleared out the spare room when family came to ensure I knew I was still welcome. They are both busy but they always made time for me to have a cuppa and have the door open to me. When my car needed to be sold Zoe put me in touch with Jamal. He is genuinely one of the loveliest people you could meet. Calling people on my behalf to sell the car, ferrying me about, travelling huge distances to try and sell it for me. Absolutely nothing is too much trouble for him. He has no personal gain, when I asked him why as he seems to have a history of selflessly helping people even near strangers. He says....... 'I just like to help'. When my things needed to be stored Gayle said, 'No problem' just bring it round we will put it our place. I turn up in Dubai and have been completely supported by Ashleigh and Kieran while I search for new work. All the people I mention, and also some I haven't has made me feel as though the world has my back, that I am not alone. I guess thats my point. I believe in the difference we make with a single act of kindness. I believe in behaviours breed behaviours, I have been so blessed to receive a huge amount of kindness this past month from people. I will continue to pass it on and be grateful for what I have received. Thank you, thank you and thank you some more.



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